So you’ve broken up with your boyfriend, the most amazing man in the world, and he won’t even speak to you.  How can you even begin to convince him that you’re just as amazing as he is and that he’s made a huge mistake in letting you go?  Your ex boyfriend doesn’t want to see you and he won’t return your calls, texts or e-mails, so what are you going to do? How do you get your ex to return your call?

What sort of message will make your ex want to return your call?  Well, there are things you can say to get him to phone you back.  A well thought out message is all it takes.  Consider what will motivate him to want to pick up the phone straight away and talk to you? 

Perhaps approach this from a negative point of view.  What will make him run away even further?  Desperation is never attractive in an ex-partner.  Telling him that you must talk to him straight away and that it’s really important that he rings you immediately, will just fill him with dread, as will the use of the word ‘emergency’, ‘urgent’ or ‘crucial’.  They’re all associated with bad news.  You want to give your ex boyfriend a reason to want to contact you. 

So, what motivates people to do things?  If you can make him curious, then you have an advantage.  You’re taking control of the situation.  You’re gaining the upper hand.  If you can convince him that you have some interesting or unusual news for him, he’ll call you.  Similarly, people are often motivated by self-interest.  If he thinks that he is going to hear something to his advantage, he is more likely to follow it up.    

How can you combine these two motivational factors into one, simple message?  How about: “Hello, Richard.  I really appreciate the personal effort you made and just wanted to thank you in person, so please call.”  It’s a positive, upbeat message with the promise of self-gain.  He’ll be curious about what he did and he’ll also be wondering what you plan to do to thank him in person.

In isolation, this message will do you no good in your efforts to get your ex boyfriend back.  Of course, you MUST think of something that you’re thanking him for.  Otherwise, this just makes you look confused and desperate.  You’ve opened up the channels of communication, but what you do and say when he calls back is more important. Have a plan already worked out. Now that you’ve got your ex to return your call, make sure that what you’re thanking him for seems believable.  Be ready to suggest how you’d like to thank him, and be prepared to be flexible.  Don’t let him feel that he must fit in with what you want to do.  Make it clear that what you’re planning is born out of genuine gratitude and not part of a cunning plan to manipulate him back into your life.

For a complete step-by-step plan on how to get your ex boyfriend back, we recommend one of the most successful books on the subject – “The Magic of Making Up” – there is lots of useful information on the official website.  Also, read our review of Magic of Making Up and see the videos for an overall view of how this book can help you.

How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back

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1. How To Get Your Boyfriend To Call You

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